Am I crazy?
And how does this affect DoTA?
Modern Philosophy and Science cannot exist without the notion that there is a part of our existence that is outside human control. In our Materialistic worldview, we have conceived of these events as "just happening". But I am no longer able to comprehend that notion; my spiritual view of the cosmos won't allow it. Call it childlike but what if the Universe has a mind(not a brain) like ours.What if we are the agents that carry out its cosmic will. Our Free Will is connected to its sense of mission, and so two things that should not coexist, predestination and free will, do so, and do so harmoniously.
This Panentheistic view of reality has important implications on the ground level. For example, what is it with dota?
Many people speak of matchmaking like it has intelligence. They cry on reddit that it is forcing their winrate to 50%.
People tell them they're just imagining things or they're just not playing well enough to have an impact.
But what if these people aren't wrong? What if they really are experiencing a calamity of teammates that are terrible and aren't allowing them to win?
And what if it's all for their own good?
In my worldview, I have an answer to this kind of experience. But to understand we have to discuss a very particular philosophical book.
Boethius' Consolation of Philosophy
In this book, written while Boethius is undergoing a Roman Death Sentence(Romans gave criminals death sentenced by slowly cutting off their body parts. They wanted to torture the criminal and they wanted the death sentence to be as long and as cruel as humanly possible). Boethius has previously been a child of fortune. He is the second-in-command to the Gothic King, he has a beautiful wife and his children are both consuls. Then he is caught in a political plot. In Consolation, Lady Philosophy, an embodiment of Philosophy herself, shows Boethius that his material sufferings are merely a distraction. He has lived a thousand lives and will live a thousand more. She shows him that everything he undergoes in his life is a test to be learned from, and by rising to the challenge he will be all the better because of it. In short, she teaches Boethius to look at the stars in wonder.
Boethius has been mistaken for talking about a Christian God, but actually he is talking about God as the whole Universe, conscious and living and breathing through man. In such a Universe, there can be no such thing as random chance.
I myself have experienced patterns in queues, but because I have this awareness, I have recognized what the hardship has brought to me. It has in fact improved my play, improved my hero pool, improved everything. But these people who complain don't see this. Winning is all that matters to them, so when they don't win, they forget that the Universe is benevolent, and because they believe only in chance, their experiences don't tie together or make sense.
Perhaps the Universe IS forcing these people to 50%, but remember when I said that we are the agents of the cosmos? If the Universe is forcing you to 50%, you are the solution, not anyone else. Even if it seems like you can't win because your teammates are terrible, you still have control over your attitude and many other things. Everything you need to unlock your potential begins with you. So nothing really changes, the wise ones aren't wrong when they say that you are the only constant factor. You're still human, you're still gonna get mad and become salty from time to time, but understanding that you are connected to everything else can help you figure out what is going on with your Dota, even if it seems like the problem is purely external, I guarantee you it is not. Something you are holding within is influencing your teammates play and yours, and you have to heal that or change it.
I hope my musings aren't so confusing or convoluted. I hope everyone who reads this takes inspiration, even if they don't agree with what is said.